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October 26, 2017

Going Deeper with The 15 Commitments: When Conscious Leadership Tools Become Weapons

One of the challenges for individuals and groups practicing conscious leadership is that the tools that are designed to support people in being more aware can easily be used as weapons.

What weaponized conscious leadership tools might sound like in action:

“You’re below the line.” Or “That comment was below the line.”

“That’s just your story.

“I want to clear with you.” (Proceeding then to dump their judgments all over the other person, making the other wrong and making themselves right without owning that they are clearing from below the line.)

“I’m just being candid or blurting.” (While taking no responsibility for being triggered and using candor as an excuse to say whatever the hell they want.)

“I’m really curious why you did what you did.” (While not actually being curious at all but using conscious language to hide their righteousness. Akin to, that was an interesting choice, when you really mean idiotic choice).

“You’re in victim; quit whining and complaining.”

“You’re not taking your 100% responsibility.”

Weaponizing is what we do when we turn our attention from ourselves and our state of consciousness to another person and what they’re doing or not doing. We use conscious speak as a way to avoid facing our own fear, defensiveness and desire to be right. The destructive power of weaponized consciousness is profound because we hide our true destructive or obstructive intentions behind words that are designed to bring us and others into presence.

Two simple practices can change this pattern.

1. Unless invited by someone, stay out of their business. Don’t tell anyone else where they are (above or below the line, in presence or drama, being a victim) or what they’re doing (taking less than 100% responsibility, blaming, complaining). Stay in your own business.

2. Before you speak; pause, breathe, check. Where are YOU and where are you speaking from?  

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